By now you'd think that I should be sick and tired of explaining this shit over and over again. But hell, let's do it once more! words are cheap, and who knows, maybe this time around one of the poor souls, who inexplicably ends up around this corner of the web reading this piece, will finally get it. And if they don't, I still have nothing to lose for writing it. Anyways.
Last week one day, just as I was preparing to begin my gym Thursday at the local place, I inadvertently lay my eyes upon the TV set over at the reception. By the way, if there are two things that I hate about gyms, those are, ranked from most to least annoying: the fucking music and the fucking screens. The latter I somewhat get, but only when they serve gym propaganda involving chicks literally working out their butts1; however, in this particular case, the TV in question was tuned to a "news" channel, where they were serving one of those awfully demoralizing "reports" about a house that burned. Yes, this is the kind of shit that you see at eight in the morning on TV nowadays: awful, just plain awful stuff. But that's not really what I wanted to lead with, or rather: that's just a tiny portion of it.
The glaringly big portion which made my blood boil wasn't in the so-called shit-gargle that they call a news report, but in the ticker, which contained a... "live" counter of "energy produced", 5.something MW, versus "energy consumed", 6.something MW, and the latter, you see, is moar!!1 than the former2. Supposedly Romanians, among the plurious problems that they're plagued with on a daily basis, are also going through an eNeRgY cRiSis! The ancestral Danube ain't flowin' its flows anymore, so the Cernavodă nukular power plants can't power their plants anymore -- despite the neighbouring Bulgarian counterpart at Kozloduy having no issues whatsoever. So anyway! this is the part where I segue back into the actual thing that I've been mentioning since at least 2020.
At some point in 2020 -- you remember 2020, don't you? that's when they told you to shut yourself indoors and wear those God-awful masks, so you'd protecc yourself from "the virus", so that they'd have about a year's time to fab injections for to provide with even more protecc so that you'd be able to safely go outside; but we digress -- at some point in 2020 there was a "news"piece involving the Romanian PM at the time, Ludovic Orban, smoking inside the Victoria Palace without a mask. Leaving aside the mask, mind you, if I remember correctly, smoking has been forbidden in Romanian public institutions since at least 2017. But that's not even the worse part; the worse part is that at most, the guy in question got away with a fine of around 600 euros, which I'd guess means peanuts for a guy his calibre. And I'm pretty sure he didn't stop smoking inside afterwards, without a mask or whatever; he just made sure that the press wouldn't bother him anymore.
So now, fast-forwarding back to our Lord's year 2026, Ilie Poverty, another sort of Ludovic Orban, except from Oradea, but otherwise of the exact same ilk, tells you to stop consuming so damn much electricity, in order to protecc yourself from... what, exactly? yes, that's a rhetorical question, and we both know the answer that you're not going to like: the whole endeavour is meant to protect you from your own sorry self; because you're the problem and by now "they" have no fucking clue what to do with you, short of resorting to gas chambers. The only problem with that method, you see, is that it's really bad for the environment, and the environment-protecc is all "that it's about"3 nowadays. So Ilie Poverty and the gang would rather you altogether went ahead and killed yourself, which is why he's putting the whole demoralizing show. Let's be clear, Ilie Poverty is not there to rule a country, what the fuck; actually, he's been an interim PM for what, three months now? I don't even remember. His role is clear: to pave the way for the moment when they'll introduce voluntary euthanasia; and by that point, it won't be them who'll volunteer to get euthanized -- it'll be you, my dear post-modern serf; you, the problem care este (tm).
As for myself, I'll be blasting my AC almost non-stop for the next few weeks, 'cause I hear they globals be really warmin' as of late4.
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If you haven't seen the genre, you should, and you should try some of the exercises yourself, say, the Bulgarian split squats, the cable extensions or the elevated Romanian deadlifts, just to get an idea of how gruesome they are. Those sexy big butts are earned through hard work, my good dudes, and you'd better respect the chicks who go through the works. ↩
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I don't know what to say, since Geography classes really weren't my strong point. But from what I recall, Romania has always consumed more energy than it produced, i.e. it's relied on some percentage of imported energy. I don't remember the percentage in question, not to mention that it's probably changed in the two decades that have passed since the high-school classes in question. I can only guess that we're likely worse off in 2026 than we were in 2006, and maybe the so-called crisis is making the problem even worse, but really, how is that my problem? I didn't vote the laws that were enacted in order to close off the coal plants "for modernization purposes"; moreover, I didn't vote the guys who voted those laws, so what the fuck do you want me to do? The only guy with a baseball bat and some guns, who was supposedly going to "overthrow the Constitutional order", was still being kept under house arrest last I heard. So go cry for him along with your "sovereigntist" fellows. ↩
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This glaringly stupid English expression, "it's not about X, it's not about Y, it's about Z and W and Theta", has in our day permeated the Romanian space too, and it sounds like crap. Thank you, 'murica, for all your great cultures that you've brought to us from o'er the ocean. We are deeply grateful for your strategically-partnered protecc-culture. And the iPhones, of course. ↩
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To the alien anthropologist: that's really not how Romanian-English vernacular sounds, but what can I do. ↩
I'm shocked, shocked! to find this level of dissident crimethink being peddled in this online establishment. Your crimes are severe, comrade Lucian, but the Party is willing to look the other way if only you would get on the treadmill, rig it to a dynamo, and pedal for your betters, er, I mean, for your country. Every watt counts. Chop chop. Be a shame if daddy's fridge ran out of power and the caviar got spoiled.
> pedal for your [...] country
That's a great slogan, I'll take it!